NEEDS TO RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RAWR!!

nightmare

Had a nightmare this morning.. Was quite terrible. Dreamt that I married an unknown person n I felt so much regret n sadness. Terrible. Nau'zubillah. I'm now waiting for my bus at vivo city, to get me to school. My RBR book is overdue by 2 hrs-so $2 fine. :/ sigh, well it'll all end tmrw Inshaallah.

Can't wait. Inshaallah.

good link:

http://chronicle.com/article/The-Shadow-Scholar/125329/

I feel so strangely free. :) It's a good feeling. Went to the Habib Noh mosque early this morning with my mum and it felt good to pray there- glad I made it in time. Had good food, they served Nasi briyani and grandma cooked lontong soto too. Shukur Alhamdulillah. Hari Raya Haji is to remind us of sacrifices. Those sacrifices that ppl around us do for us, selflessly, and with no expectations for anything in return. Like how my mum selflessly wakes up every morning to work and earn a living for my family and me. Or how my grandma will bear all pain and exhaustion to cook for her kids and grandkids. Sacrifice takes all forms. I'm thinking about the sacrifices I have made and hmm, tbh there aren't many. One, I do sacrifice some weekends and free time to spend time with my family but then again, that makes me happy so I don't really count that as a sacrifice. studying hard to ensure that I'll do well enough (to get a job)- thn again, that too is self-driven if you think about it. So hmm. I dunno, but I honestly can't really think of any real sacrifices I have made.

Oh wells. =) Happy Eid everyone.

at this moment, I'm overwhelmed. I am reminded of Allah's greatness and his wonderful blessings. :) Feel very blessed, Alhamdulillah. Went through about 4.5yrs of Uni, 1.5 yrs worth of internship experience and made countless of wonderful friendships. This is SUCH a special day. ok, I'm acting like this is the last day of school but it's this friday that is my last day of school. I can do this (have 1 20 pg long report, 1 more presentation, 1 test tmr, 1 grp report due on Sunday). Can do this can do this! :) Amin.

Dear Allah,

so many sweet ppl surround me. all asking me how I have done for the Bain interview cos they thought it's today. It's tmr -postponed again. Haiz, I really want to do this well. Please let me get through. Amin.

Love,

Khairah

What's most important?

Hi, this post was inspired by my countless hours of thinking, doodling, and whiling away. It usually follows an extremely productive period- and I had one of such 'periods' yesterday. I was really quite hardworking, managed to type out my bit for my compensation group report and even rushed till the very minute the library closed (i.e. 9pm) to brainstorm and look up some library books for my upcoming Product and brand presentation on Tuesday. So yes, I think I did work quite hard (can be harder lah but still, gime some credit yeah, haha).

So anyway I was thinking, facebook-ing, reading, etc. And I realise that so many of us are quite full of ourselves. Guess it's natural, we want to believe that we're all important in some way or another. And we try to 'prove' it by the types of activities we choose to participate in, the causes we partake in and devote our lives to, even the types of friends we associate ourselves with and would like to be close with or the jobs we take up. That's not even a laundry list and of cos, even if I did try, I won't even be able to list them all even in a thesis. At the end of the day though, the truth will surface- whether or not what you thought was important was indeed important, or whether or not you were indeed important the way you thought you were.

To some extent, I believe that at some point, we will realise that we were disillusioned and that the self-importance perception that we once held will be shattered. That someday, we'll look back, and smirk- that's what I thought? Hah. But that is not to say that we should give up being disillusioned for that self-importance is in fact the fuelling force for many. It can rouse up the spirit to do even greater things than if you removed it altogether. Some bask in the glory of being the popular one, some relish in being the funny one, others in the success at school, or even through the other causes they partake in. Yet, guess it boils down to the greater question of what is most important. What is it that you want to achieve through your life? Be the change-maker/ go with the flow and see where it gets you or? It doesn't matter I guess, but how you define that goal will in some ways define your success at the end of it all and also how disillusioned/ happy you emerge at the end of it all.

For me, this blog post was needed to re-align my thoughts and 'self-vision'. I want to make as big a positive difference and impact as I can on all those around me. Some scoff, others say that's too vague, but I do. So, for that, I'll just have to do what's necessary to get me there- and put in the effort to think of new ideas that can help bring about that change and impact (no matter to what degrees) to the many people around me and through the platforms available around me. My wonderful family, YWLC, school, the many wonderful people around me, grassroots and hopefully a really cool job and just seize the day (every single day from now on). Inshaallah.

I did a blood test and the doctor said I had an abnormally high level of one particular enzyme in my liver! :( And she asked me if I drank alcohol?! Hahaha. asked her what that could mean: and she says there are several possibilities: 1) too muc alcohol, 2) hepatitis B or 3) too much fatty food (she said its quite common in younger patients tho). I'm thinking it;s the last factor, surely. Damn.

Time for an overhaul.

SELAMAT HARI RAYA! :D

Check out my cute lil niece, Nur Alishah Daniah. ( I think that's how it's spelt).

if my mum can go through all that shit, so can I. I'm strong enough for this, Inshaallah.