Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Slenge Bach

Slenge Bach
Have I told you how very slenge( dumb) i can get? Well, verrryyy. So slenge, it makes me wanna slap my forehead in frustration, hoping that slap can somehow wake those dormant brain cells up.
Ok, I owe you a description of the source of all this slengeh-ness. So well, while I was complaining to everyone who would care to listen on how my timetable starts at the ungodly hour of 10am and ends at an equally ungodly hour of 8pm, I roused the sympathy of many. Except, at 6 pm after rushing out, half-skipping-half running-as gracefully and as speedily as speed and grace can cooperate as a combi on the very wet floor because God knows how many hot exchange students there are in NUS now and the last thing I need is to fall on my butt and be the butt of everyone's jokes (pun intended),I realised how very wasted all that sympathy was, and how very slengeh I really am. I entered the room which was supposed to be the venue of my german lecture only to see a good 15 blank confused, agape faces staring at me like one would after seeing a damn curly-haired girl (whose resemblance to the lion must have been uncanny at this point). I was so kancheong, but Thank goodness the not so dormant brain cells didnt act against me, and I had enough sense or german instinct in me to know that these 15 ppl cant be doing german, and true enough I saw many jap books scattered around. You know come to think of it, I think those students must have entertained the idea that I could be their Jap tutor, for when I entered, they looked rapt in attention.
"eh, is this jap?"
And the stunned 15 ppl were shaken out of their shock n muttered a resounding "Yes..."

Ahahaha, so I panicked. Hey it was past 6pm already and thinking I must have gotten the venue wrong, I rushed to this ang moh woman who was using her laptop and begged to use her laptop. I practically snatched her laptop away only to find online that my german tutorial is TOMORROW. There you go, slengeh khairah for you. *applause* (curtseys politely and turns around only to bang into a wall) So now you can really pity me, for tomorrow my lessons start at 9am (if 10am is ungodly, what is 9?!) and end at 8pm, this time FOR REAL lah. *screams*

Monday, August 27, 2007

tell it straight to her face
I'm so darn pissed. I can't fathom WHY some people can't do what they're assigned to do, or at the very least inform someone in advance if they can't do it. What happened to the need in taking responsibility and initiative? I feel like being a bitch and telling her this straight to her face. Well like karma, she's going to have it coming back to her, soon enough.
Anyway I'm at the central library alone once again, i like this independence. And btw theres this extremely gorgeous girl sitting right in front of me. She has this healthy glow, almost like she's golden skinned, but oh so jambu lah! She looks like she's of mixed parentage- Asian and Spanish except her hair's this gorgeous dark raven. Okay just how many times have I used the word 'gorgeous'. Gosh lesbian tendencies. tsk tsk. I'm so gonna tell her she's so pretty. I mean such beauty ought to be appreciated.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

humble beginnings, sweet endings

Updates: Welcome tea on Friday 24th Aug was a success. :) Atleast 35 people came, and considering this is the first time the NUS Aerobics subclub is having a welcome tea in its gazillion years of existence, I'm okay with the results). Nevermind the fact that we spent way too much, and that there was too much food leftover- the outcome of ordering too much food that was bound to be untouched especially after an hour of Cardioaerobics session. Hahaha, so we ( the comm members and many of those who came for the welcome tea) ta pao-ed all the food left, which was alot by the way. I got to bring home a huge tray of food, which thankfully wasn't such a hassle, thanks to my all time faithful chauffeur. ;) Come, let the photos do the talking.




From top to bottom : i) The aerobics welcome tea participants in action! ii) The focus for this pic is really the drinks. iii) 4 of my comm members(sze kwan,fang yin, me and huey yie) in an extremely sheepish pose. The other 10 are missing. iv) This was Sze Kwan's idea for us to look dao, and we had it nailed too, except fang yin HAD to smile. :)


You know, I have a good feeling about my comm members, I really like them. Hopefully we can all click as a team and see the club to greater, better things. :) And yes ah, finally the welcome tea is over, you'd be surprised by the amount of work, coordination and planning that goes into small things like welcome teas, man. Next time you attend small events like this, don't ever underestimate the amount of effort that has gone into it, and be appreciative.


I got my ride to the Tan Tock Seng hospital to visit my grandpa, armed with that whole tray of leftover catered food. It was good to see my grandpa, grandma and aunt there after what seemed like a long day at school. There's something unspoken but nonetheless a very special feeling when returning to a place with family members after a tiring day, its a simple kinda feeling yet unmatched in terms of the sense of belonging and contentment it evokes. Sadly though, grandpa wasn't looking too good, though I lied and told him the reverse, just so he can stay strong mentally. My aunt informed me that he has already started the intake of morphine and has started throwing up ( one of the side effects of that drug). :(


I love this pic. :) .

my pretty aunt

The many many bouquets for my incredible grandfather.

An hour or so after I arrived at TTSH, an old time family friend dropped by to visit my grandpa. He's one classic example of those rags to riches success stories- from the penniless Pakistani immigrant that he was 22 years ago to the present millionaire owner of the Jalan Kayu Eatery and many other eateries around Singapore and the world. Talking to him was insightful for he confided in me the importance of staying true to your dreams, and having the will to persevere and to have faith even when all the odds are against you. Inspirational words from a inspirational man.

Yet, I had the feel that he was a more melancholic, jaded man in comparison to the highly-spirited, energetic man I had known years ago at the age of 5. He confided in us his sadness and regret over the fact that many people in this world today no longer seem to appreciate the value of the heart but instead, are more drawn to riches and wealth, foregoing what he feels is most important- unadulterated love and compassion, the type that's free of the influece of greed and malice. I couldn't help but share a partof his sorrows, for I can tell how many a times many just choose to ride on the suuccess of the wealthy and successful ones, for their own selfish and personal gains. And many a times, this becomes so much more apparent when you're rich.

Money, what a boon and a bane it can both be. But if anything, meeting up with the wealthy ones like him has certainly reminded me of how overrated money really is, and that as cliche as this saying goes, "money really cannot buy happiness". On our way home, he offered to sponsor my studies to the US, which is an offer I'd only be too thrilled to take, but won't because I'd be greatly indebted. When we reached home, he took out this whole thick wad of $50 bills, and handed me two. Money, money money, oh and I just got the $1500 bursary today, so yeay. :)

Today(sat), after the bursary awards, I made my way to dayah's new place for her open house. Liza n bf, mairah, wany, dayah n lulu were there ( fahna had to leave early). We had planned a small get-together cum a farewell gathering for Lulu before she leaves for her exchange program to UCLA for the rest of this sem come 7th Sept. We watched this indonesian movie, ate, talked, laughed, took photos and hugged. Alright, let the photos do the talking.






Okay la, goodnight. :)

Thursday, August 23, 2007

There's a silver lining to every rain cloud, a good to every bad.
Those who choose to see it, will. Those who don't, won't.

Eh, I like my title. Its original btw. OK, big deal, as though its soooo hard to come up with something like that. ANYWAY, I'm happy. like lightheaded kinda happy, like bouncy-skippy kinda happy, a little lilt to my walk kinda happy. It feels good to be happy, to know that I have got so much to be thankful for, for love, for peace, for family, for my loved ones, for hope, for dreams and for every small little thing that makes it all right. Today, my Stats lecture which began at 10am, ended at 11:25am and I was punctual for once. Only because I was supposed to go for a make-up german lecture with Frau Geiser at 8am today, but being the never punctual person that I am, I woke up at 730am. But I didnt give up hope then, I jumped out of bed convinced that I could still make it to school for her class, I was planning to take a cab when I realised that by the time I was all showered and ready, that it was 7:56am. I mean seriously, not even a flight would have been able to get me to NUS in 4 minutes ( I mean if you count boarding time and all lah, unless its a private jet, but even then, I'm sure it'd take atleast 10 minutes eh?) So yes, I gave up THEN, at 7:56am. I'm like that, never practical, over-ambitious to the point of being delusional, but frankly speaking I kinda like me that way though it'd definitely pay to be more realistic.

Anyhow, after my stats lecture at 11:25am, I had another 6 hours 35 minutes to kill before the other make up german lecture that I had no choice but to go for, since I can't make it for tomorrow's slot because of the welcome tea. I was planning on rotting, stoning, spacing out, sleeping, drooling, dreaming, stoning, thinking and stoning (yes alot of stoning). I mean what else would you do? I need to study badly, what with my heavy involvement with Aerobics and the planning of the welcome tea and all, but I just couldn't, ah well atleast I managed to revise a bit of German.
Speaking of which, I'm taking German 3 now. DON"T ASK ME WHY. Frau Verry asked me why (no, she didnt single me out SPECIFICALLY to ask, I'm not that lousy lah, haha but she was asking us all one by one) and my reply was, "Ich finde die Deutsch sprache auch sehr interesserant."- directly translated would be " I find the German language very interesting". THAT is the generic answer every "Damn, why's she asking me this" kinda student would give for sucha question. The all safe, politically correct, lets smoke-through-this-one and not stir up too much controversy else she'll push more dauting german gibberish my way and let's just stay low key kinda answer. Okay, if you find German ineteresting, go ahead take the intro course, but finding it interesting will not give you the good grades you need for it, you need to have conviction, a strong reason for wanting to do German 3, not something as vague as "Its interesting" (smiles politely, curtseys and scrambles away). Bleargh, I dunno why I'm so hard on myself over one stupid answer but I am not doing German 3 because I find it interesting. Okay maybe I do, but its not the quintessential reason, and thus and therefore should not be offered as the answer to that type of question which is obviously looking for the prime, de facto reason. I am doing German because I believe that I should complete what I started on, that you cannot claim to know a language right after one or two levels of language modules and that being multilinguistic is a talent and skill not everyone is fortunate enough to acquire. I have a reason, a strong one, many strong ones. Thing is, I would have gladly told her all these with confidence, conviction and passion, just so she knows I am not the typical run-off the mill "German's interesting" kinda student, I WOULD HAVE(!) had she not asked me in German. :S

apa dah. hahaha. Okay, I wanna type in German, practise a bit , shall we? Ich bin sehr mude und jetzt habe ich ein schwierigkeit. Ich vermisse meine Opa. Er ist jetzt zu krank und hat viel Schmerzen aber ich kann nicht er besser und gesundlich machen. Opa, du bist einem gud Man und immer denke ich an dich. Ich liebe dich zu viel. Ich wisse du bist jetzt sehr krank und nichts sage ich kannst du hilfen, aber ich bete du wollst heilig. Ich liebe dich Opa. Morgen mochte ich besuche dich in das Krankenhaus,Inshaallah.

My goodness. There must have been a billion mistakes in that short passage. I was just talking about my grandpa and how much I miss him. Have I mentioned that he has been experiencing immense pain lately, and its crushing to see him in so much pain. Doctors are going to be putting him on morphine pretty soon. I can't bear to see him in so much pain. They say patients facing the final stages of cancer will experience pain like no other, whose immensity can only be open to the imagination. I'm constantly imagining on how painful it must be, maybe like a bad bad tummyache except 20 times intensified, combined with the pain of severe migraine intermingling with the pain one feels during constipation? These are the only kinds of illnesses and pain I've had to bear thus far, and imagine how trivial these must be in comparison to the morphine needing pain induced by terminal liver cancer. God, this is painful, watching him in so much pain, please, I pray that you have mercy and alleviate his pain ya Allah, for he's a good man, he really is.

It must be tiring to read this, what with the emotional vexation it evokes and the dramatic swing from a happy beginning to a sad closing. But no, it won't be a sad closing for I am still happy. I love my life, my grandpa, and Allah for giving us time to let him go cos only He knows how if he should snatch my grandpa away without any prior warning, how it would rip the life out of all of us. So, thank you Allah, but please help ease this pain that he's feeling.

Okay, smile people. I love you all. :)

Monday, August 20, 2007

Where there is love, there is hope.


I'm in the library once again, comforatbly settled down in one of those big yellow-green-red couches at the level of the library. My couch is the green one. Haha, so random. My mondays end really fast (at 12 noon! It starts at 10am btw. In fact because my stats lecturer pushes the 15 mins break to the end of the lecture,my monday ends at 1130am!) And I would have made my way home gleefully except that I've just been assigned to do aerobics duty today which starts at the ungodly hour of 5pm.


:( BUT I'm nice, and I've got to be a little more compromising lah now that I'm chairperson I suppose. Oh well, frankly I'm beginning to feel the weight of holding sucha post, there's alot of planning and coordination to do, and all this I've come to realise, even before I officially take over the post. I've planned the welcome tea but I dunno, response doesn't seem good so far. :S SO, all u NUS girls who think u wanna be in NUS Aerobics Subclub or even try out for the committee, come join us on the 24th AUG, Friday at MPSH2 from 4:30-6pm! Free food, free cardio aerobics workout and promised fun! =)




Okay enough of that, I've been having a severe migraine attack for the past two days, which has thankfully subsided today. The effect of much crying and undue stress. Haha, so much for being a stone-hearted person, eh. I've been crying at the slightest things. Like how when I was in the car with kai to visit my grandpa, and we were talking about my upcoming TP, and it caused the outpour of tears because I might never get the chance to drive him around. Or during tuition when Hidir mum loves blasting the radio with all those damn emo malay songs, and I start crying, okay tearing cos the tunes are so sad and they remind me of him, nevermind the fact that those songs speak of a very different kind of love.And I've not only been cryiing for my grandpa, but when I think of my grandma as well. Recently, when my family and I were at the hospital to visit my grandpa, my grandma said something like, "If you go first, make sure you call me. If I go first, I'll call you along". I mean why say that kinda things? Sad la siah. I mean in comparison to the bond I have with my grandpa, the bond I've forged with my garndma supercedes it by a long shot. She's like my soulmate, my hugs-mate, debate opponent, fantastic cook, friend, confidante all rolled into one. If I were ever to lose her, I really can't imagine how I'd deal with this blow.


Okay, enough of all these sad thoughts. Think positive.


Yesterday after Hi-Tea at Swissotel (which was damnn good btw, better than Straits Kitchen), my mum and I made our way to the hospital to visit my grandpa. We were at the City Hall train station when my mum walked onwards to this other MRT door, and I followed her of course. And lo and behold, guess who was there?! Sushi lah! Actually I saw sushi's fren first at first I though he looked alot like this Mj senior, (for anonymity's sake, i really shouldn't mention their names, but if ur close enough to me, you should know lah) and then suddenly I hear this all so familiar voice. My heart almost stopped, and I possibly risked ending up side by-side to my grandpa's bed, only, this time as a patient not visitor. Gosh, what a coincidence lah. All my life when I was in JC, and I'd NEVER get to see him anywhere else but in school, and NOW I see him everywhere. that's an exaggeration of course but nvm, its cool to see him around. :) Hehehe.

So yes it was damn awkward I think, I wished I could talk to him but mum was there lah, so very weird. Oh BUT my mother was asking me who that guy was, and when I told her who he is, she was like, "so he's that one?!" I almost fainted. My mum remembers him! I mean ok, so I DID tell her about him, but THAT was eons ago, and nothing too specific of course, just what a nice, mature and accomplished individual he is. And I was so excited to think that my mum actually remembers him that I barely saw them alighting at Dhoby Ghaut. Oh well.




My gorgeous mum at Swissotel


Okay, so anyway, my family has decided to revise our mindset when it concerns my grandfather's illness. Previously it was all tears, tears and more tears and getting my grandpa any food he wants, signifying our giving up of hope. Now, its the all new revamped, you-never know, and we can still fight midset! Yesterday I gave my grandpa this prep talk-military style(anyhow only this girl),



"Mr. Mohamed Ghouse, do u want to live?



A feeble "Yes"



No, that was too soft. If you want to live, you must fight! You must fight for me! Can you do that?



A slightly louder yes.



No, thats not enough. Your "yes" must be loud enough to ring in the ears of every patient in this ward. You can do it okay! You must not give up! You will only fail if you give up, so fight, and you will win! And we will all fight with you okaay! So many people have been given a few weeks to live, but they made it, cos they fought to live! And so must you! Because we still need you! Fight!"


"Yes!" (Okay so it wasn't exactly the loud, ringing yes I wanted, but given his condition, it was good enough lah ah.) hahaha, and I made him give me a high 5 a few times, until it was forceful enough.

You know I'm glad we've changed our perspective, because there really is nothing a mind cannot overcome, be it a problem, a fear or even terminal liver cancer. So let's pray that it pays off, Inshaallah. Even if it doesn't, I'll still be very proud of my fighter grandpa. :)



That wonderful man once again.




Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Relativity
No, I haven't decided to do an analysis on or a discussion of Einstein's or Galileo's principles of relativity or any other scientist's relativity concept for that matter. Not that I know enough to wanna discuss bout it anyway, haha. Anyhow, the relativity that I wanna talk about here, is also a force albeit of a different kind, but equally pivotal as Einstein's milestone discovery and is in fact dominant and constantly at work in our lives. Like how happiness is relative, success is relative, sorrow is relative, prices are relative. Everything really. Including you and I.

Imagine being in a clothes store (like the shop whose name rhymes with khairah), where everything is tagged at $75 and above, suddenly you catch sight of a simple cotton top that's $29 for instance, and that suddenly seems much cheaper than when ur in a shop with everything going at $29. Or when you're troubled and down but everyone including urself expects you to snap out of it, bcos compared to the woman in the Darfur terror-stricken region, you've got it much better. Life is all about relativity if you think about it.

You can be smart, but if everyone else is smarter, then hey, ur smart may not be that smart after all. Thats reflected in the whole bell curve system in our Singaporean universities (not sure bout SMU though). But before you race ahead of me n deem this entry as yet another piece aimed at pin-pointing the flaws of the bureaucracy, just wait or dismiss that thought away altogether, cos its not. I just think that its strange how everything is so relative to everything else. Strange yet not incomprehensible I suppose. Cos how else would we derive the basic yardsticks or benchmarks to help us take a stance n 'review' something. Puts the saying "No man is an island" into a whole new perspective.


Yet, this need to always compare can be misleading, grossly inaccurate and not worth following. I mean, so a woman in Darfur is pained, heartwrenched and devastated, -God bless them- , I mean who wouldn't be with the kind of things happening there? And put an adult lady from a more prosperous country, say Singapore or New York, who's just lost her wallet for instance and is feeling really miserable about it, obviously the latter's woes pale in comparison. But why should it? I'm not saying it is a BIGGER or equally big heartpain to have lost your wallet as contrasted to losing your chastity or loved ones. Hell no, make me choose and I'll gladly lose my wallet anytime, and no I'm not biased, take it from me, a woman who just lost her wallet, containing her I/c, mastercard,matric card, ATM n what-not bout 2 months ago. Why I'm saying this is really cos, no comparision can be a fair one, especially when it concerns feelings, experiences and people. Simply because no two people are the same. So yeah, the New York woman who just lost her wallet may be equally pained as that Darfur woman. Again I emphasise, I am not belittling the pain and misery these poor women in Darfur have to undergo on a daily basis. Let's pray for them, really.


But I suppose, comparisons make life convenient, gives us the capacity to infer and make wise judgments, nevermind the fact that they may not be accurate at all. 'If-everyone's-doing-it, -why-not me?' mentality at work here. Good to remember that not everything has an objective perspective to it, that sometimes some things really beyond our capacity to judge.


Why I'm saying all this may have a link, direct or indirect to all thats happened lately in my life. Some happy, some painfully heartbreaking. Happy news first: I'm about to be the new President for Aerobics Subclub. :) Absolutely thrilled, though I still have this inkling of a suspicion that I may not have been the first choice (haha), but well, its a big honour, and yeay to a more stellar resume, Inshaallah. Sad news though overwhelms any possible happy news I may have. A growth measuring 7cm in diameter was found in my grandpa's liver about 3 weeks ago. Tests were done only to find, last Monday that it is cancerous, malignant and in the advance stages. The doctor has given my grandpa a maximum of 3 months. I have nothing else to say, but please, I don't need sympathy darlings though I've never once doubted your concern. Just, if you do care enough, please take your time to pray that my grandpa will be bestowed with endless blessings and happiness, and that there is minimal pain. I can't exactly explain my emotions, I've not cried thus far, only teared, and I hate it. Shouldn't one cry their eyes out when you hear such news? Reminds me of the time in TKGS when one of my friends was diagnosed with leukaemia, I remember everyone of my friends crying so much, and there I was cursing my stone of a heart for being so hard. I would love for the tears to flow, but really the tearless eyes and solemn face mask the pain inside.


To the handsome man I've always loved:

I love you grandpa, for everything you are, and for everything you've done for me. Like the mornings during my first two sems in NUS when you will wake up early, despite the pain just to make me breakfast and watch me leave for school, or the many times you'd readily give me cash, using the "If you don't take, I'll be damn sad tactic" that works all the time, and for the endless cow, monkey, goat and bird sounds that you've impersonated that never fail to crack me up and the many many, Japanese stories, of the time you played soccer with Lee Kuan Yew and all the funny jokes. Oh God, how badly I'll miss you. You've been an angel, Grandpa, no less than that. I'll miss you terribly when you're gone but I promise that I'll make you proud no matter where you are, and that I will fulfill the many dreams you had for me and for our family. I love you Mr. Mohamed Ghouse, I wish I could say "please don't go", but I suppose Allah has better plans for you. Wait for me up there in the Heavens. I hope to join you there in 40-50 years. Inshaallah.
Love, warm hugs and kisses,
One of your loyal fans, your Granddaughter Khairah :)

Saturday, August 11, 2007

How could I break an angel's heart.
And I miss you already.
Regret, pain migles with certainty, a terrible confusing mixture for a soft heart.
I'm not as strong after all.
But we'll make it thru, both you and I.
And I'll still b here though nothing will be the same.
Have faith dear, you'll be fine in no time.

Monday, August 6, 2007

Carpe Diem: seize the day!

Carpe Diem: seize the day!


Hi, how have you been doing? I've been happy nevermind the fact that my throat's still sore and I've got a bit of the flu. Why? I'm done with work! From last friday 6:00pm to be exact! =D Weehoo! So this is the last week before I get back to school. I intend to make it a helluva week. Squeezing in all last minute meet-ups with everybody I haven't got a chance to meet yet, settle all the admin stuff, plan birthdays (for my grandma), read books (I've started re-reading the 1st Harry Potter book. Did you know that Harry's hair will regrow overnight should he cut it? Ah, memory refresher), watch all those VCDs n DVDs I've bought/borrowed but never got to watching and shoppp some more! And cycling! One last week mah! I am not excited about the idea of getting back to school, but I suppose it beats working, so I'm grateful. And with Kiran having a car now, atleast we can go gallavanting after school and during our breaks! Tsk tsk, what a mindset to start school with.

Okay before I go on, I think I just wanna say that NUS Biz sch may indeed be trying to seek redemption for their sucky bidding system, cos now atleast the vacancies in the core modules I couldn't previously get are open to business students. But of course, the bid points are sky high. I've just placed a 750 points bid for Managerial Acctg, and to think that I detest Accounting. Okay, will just have to wait and see.

Other updates, I met up with Max after a good 2 years of MIA-ing! Hahaha, and I didn't take any photos unfortunately. But it was still fun, he's an assistant chef at the Raffles Town Club lah! Life is so full of surprises.

And yesterday, yesterday was a very special day. Did you know it was supposed to be Friendship's Day yesterday? Atleast my friend Milin from India says so. But friendship day or not, it definitely was a Friendship kinda day for me. :)

Was supposed to meet Nadz,mairah,juju at east coast at 11am for the picnic cum cycling cum swimming get-together. I woke up at 10:30am cos I was dreaming about them. It was a way funny dream cos we were going from house to house selling JUBAHS. And we ended up at Naseem's house, only to be told off by her mum. This I dreamed of, despite never having visited Naseem's house, or never having met her mum before. Her mum said some hurtful things like how we don't deserve to sell jubahs when we're not that religious or smtg, which may be a description befitting for me, but not at all apt for the rest of my 3 religious friends.

Then, I remember us walking away feeling really hurt, and taking the lift down before Mairah said," Hey let's go pray Maghrib". I suppose that was my mind's way of telling me I'm going to be really late, cos I woke up next. Rushed as fast as I could, only to reach marine parade at 12noon. My two others rahs were late, FOR ONCE! ok revise that, I was early FOR ONCE. muahahaha.

Anyway after nearly an hour of figuring out how to get to each other, cos we were all stuck at different parts in Marine Parade, we were soon happily settled down in my tent, with loads of junk, high calorie, but nonetheless, feel good finger food cataching up on what really is a whole year of stories and love-life developments. It was an honest, hearts and souls baring conversation that lasted a few hours, and which ended in tears at some point. I don't think I'll forget this ever. I love these girls way too much.:) Nadz had to leave soon enough, and after some photos (which I don't have yet but will post as soon as I have) we left.

Kai fetched mairah and I from the marine parade lib and mairah took over the wheels, while I was dumped to the back seat feeling like some rich tauke. Ah, the benefits of being licence-less.;)

I had tuition next which was more tiring than usual. Then I met susu who was also in pasir ris of cos (since she lives there). We were on the phone trying to figure out where in pasir-ris we both were, walking aimlessly in the dark, squinting for landmarks and street signs, before we finally met at block 190. It was so funny how we were both so lost, and how susu is quite tak boleh harap even when she's the one living in pasir ris! We walked to her house, talking all the way under the moonlight. Then she got changed and we left for white sands for another long heart-to-heart talk over our hotplates dinner at Cavana.

Friends like these are forever. :)

Okay, now for the many photos I promised two entries ago, but never got to doing cos I've been way too lazy. For ameera especially, see I wasn't bedek-ing, not for long anyway.



Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
K2, gf and me. This is a wayy overdue photo.oh well.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
gf and me. No we're not lesbians or anything, just been calling her that since forever and now its weird to change.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
that kecik fella and me. She's great company.=)
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Anuar Zain at some Jamiyah carnival!! He's really humble btw. And a damn good life singer.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
my all time, come rain-come shine Umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh fren, Susu!
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Me

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
I had to put this up. This was the photo I took on my own, only to leave susu agape, cos to her, that was the epitome of tak-tahu malu-ness.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
expressway. For fun, joy and laughter.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Huda and me!!
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
The Indon tourist
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
This one's from India.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Johor Bahru! Just in case ur as jakun as me.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
I wasn't kidding when I said we bought alottt of food.Dunkin Donuts!
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
All that Breadtalk deprivation was made up for with Malaysia's halal breadtalk!!
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
I think we had a good 20 buns in there or so. Many floss ones especially. :)


Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Halal Sushi! looks sooo good eh.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
I think I 've eaten enough donuts to do a donut critic already. My verdict,the most worth your money and time donuts: Dunkin Donuts. And now you can get them delivered to S'pore. (Donut Factory's donuts are good, but not worth the wait ah)
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
I always do stupid things like this with my grandma.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Xin Yi and I on her last day of work. 20.07.2007
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
this is super pathetic, but this is THE ONLY photo I took during our sleepover at lulu's house. Nvm, the rest are etched in my mind.:)
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
My inside-out beautiful cousin sister turns 18! This was at Hyatts. Had dinner at Straits Kitchen again! ;) 23.07.2007
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
The all customary mat pose.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Just cos we're multi-racial, the typical Ah-lien one.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
I dunno when, but I think this was the day we got a second dose of Dunkin donuts. 3 boxes.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Proving that I can be the domesticated housewife someday. Shopping at Mustafa.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Haagen Dazs, Raffles City
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Chocolate fondue! Wayyyyyyyy good. DUH.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

A different kind of fondue...

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
Cheese fondue!! I think this picture looks ad-ish. I should sell this to Pizza Hut.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
No, not joss sticks, just standing satay-less satay sticks.
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
The day we were finishing what's left of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows over coffee and muffin.

Okay I have a billion other photos, but I'm too lazy. Shall post somemore soon enough. To everyone, take good care, and enjoy whats left of your holidays! All those back in school, study smart okay! Take good care darlings. =)

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Hell hath no fury like an unsuccessful bidder's scorn


Come every August or Jan (for the past year, this year and for atleast 1 or 2 more years to come), my heart will start aching, my head throbbing, the veins and arteries pulsing violently, threatening to burse open, my pressure jumps sky high and I am frustrated beyond coaxation. ALL because of my darling, prestigious, oh-so well esteemed NUS's cursed, damned, blood-sucker bidding system.

Because of you, you NUS, I jolly well think my dreams will end up in the drain. Because of you, I, who's earnest to gain all that knowledge has been deprived of the chance once again. Because of you, I'm uncertain of what to do next. Because of you, I start cursing and swearing, breaking my never-use-expletives-philosophy yet again. Because of you.. FUCK YOU NUS. What the hell is wrong with you?! I don't see why the new Biz freshies can get their modules pre-assigned to them this year WITHOUT the hassle and heartache that comes with bidding, whereas us, the seniors (of a much smaller batch) are denied the same luck. What, we don't matter enough is it?

Suddenly there is a need to match up to competitive, and potentials-grabber SMU and NTU is it? Wah lao, I bet if you(whoever is in charge of this whole bidding thing) TRIED, you would be able to design some kind of system that similarly pre-allocates modules to the returning students (READ: the loyal ones who STUPIDLY decided to give you a chance) just like how it is for the freshies.

I only got like what a pathetic 2 modules from the 4 I bid for, and now suddenly to my horror, I don't think I can go on to do my double major unless I do honours in one of them. WHY? Cos NUS only allocates us with 120 Modular Credits to use. And I've used too many on modules like german and philosophy. Here I am, a hopeful youth thrilled and excited at the prospect of acquiring knowledge, doing modules that I want only to have this dream crushed because of this freaking no-brainer system that has been around for ages, when every other University manages just fine without it. Wow, I swear I've never been more frustrated.

They say, "You plan to fail, if you fail to plan". Here at NUS, you plan or not, you fail. Too damn bad.

Disclaimer: Kids, my usage of expletives is juvenile, this I concede. So do better than me in anger management and just go spam the university with hate emails and petitions or what-not WITHOUT the use of expletives, okay? OR even better, if ur still of pre-tertiary age, just stay far, far away from NUS.