OMG> I AM SO BODOH> I SWEAR IM SO BODOH. :( Juz called me the other day to tell me that Jodi picoult was in national lib, and I thought she was referring to the books! And then when she said, yup"The person herself" I thought she was referring to Haha! WTH. My once in a lifetime opportunity to meet up with my favourite author and I HAD to turn BODOH ON THAT SAME DAY. I'M DEPRESSED, BYE. :(

Look deep within

Hi World, I'm now on my 3rd day of my internship and well, its definitely better than the last one. Atleast I don't have to do telemarketing, but that said, special shout out to Adilah,: Hope ur coping well babe!
Minutes ago I was in the washroom, returning Nature's call and responding to my biological reaction to Nescafe, and while I was doing my 'business', I heard someone coming into the toilet, HEAVING AND PANTING (honestly for lack of a better description, like a hippo, ok do hippos pant? well, just panting like u've had crazy wild sex(Not that I would know how thats like, of cos, JUST GUESSING) or like someone who's rannnnn a marathon, no, completed a triathlon. SO yes, it was HEAVY PANTING. I was a bit freaked out cos I was thinking this person must have had to hold her bladder for really long la to heave like that, and yeah my heart went out to her. Anyway coincidence got her into the cubicle next to mine and I SWEAR THE MINUTE SHE GOT IN, I think she practically stripped or smtg, cos the next thing I KNEW, I saw this black pants thing on the floor. THAT WAS FUNNY and disturbing in a way, cos I mean how often do u see these kinda things man, except in those comedies on TV? But well, so after finishing whatever I had to do, I left the cubicle and yeah stayed around to catch a glimpse of this heavily panting lady.

OKAY, pls dun think I STAYED AROUND FOR YEARS or smtg, just kinda took my time with washing my hands and all that. AND well, in a matter of minutes, this lady a.k.a. HP (short for HEAVY PANTER) came out. OKay, I don't wanan be mean but well she was huge, quite extremely obese, which perhaps explains why she was panting like that. But of cos that didn't disturb me,(I MEAN WHY SHOULD IT), I was just disturbed by the fact that she was wearing a dress, which only logically concludes that the big black trousers thing that I saw on the floor, must have been her, yeah UNDIES. But okay, stop being a bitch Khairah, and I'm not a bitch okay. so before you start mentally accusing me of being sucha superficial person who likes ridiculing people who're bigger than me, DON'T cos REALLY, this entry is really meant to reflect on how misleading and superficial looks are, cos after we both washed our hands and took some of the tissue to wipe our hands, she gave me this really heartwarming smile, those beaming kind, something you'd RARELY get from any hot, skinny lady, whose main aim in life is to scrutinize u from head to toe like as though I'm somehow fading. Don't blame me for this bias, it comes from experience. And yeah, so I left the toilet, feeling a bit thankful cos I mean no matter how plump I can gget, at teh very least I'm not obese, but most of all, I left the toilet feeling a bit sad cos whilst it is obvious she's such a warm and kind lady, not everyone will be inclined to appreciate her inner beauty only because she doesn't fit the beauty bill physically.

Okay, all this, from ONE toilet experience. Shoot yourself if you say Life's boring.

Hi, I'm loading for 'A walk to remember' to finish loading and its seriously taking agesssss. I feel like I'm rotting away in boredom ALREADY. Can u imagine? ANd its only like what, my SECOND day of hols. and I only have till the end of sunday (TOMORROW) since I'll be sarting my internship on Monday. But I guess thats all in good measure especially since having things to do actually means u'll be pressed for time, and then it pushes you to get things done, cos I'm just that kinda person who needs to be pushed la. K, don;t mind me, but I gotta do this little mental-blog list thing to remind myself of what to do: 1) Send out sponsorship proposals to M1, BP, Some sunblock company, just get the T shirts done, and arrange for next meeting, arrange for ameeting with syl, mich n agnes b4 that. YEAH. I CAN DO THIS. Okay that was a very long number 1 I just realised. Haha. Anyhow to that certain someone, you'll get through this, Inshaallah, Allah loves you. I know THAT for sure. =)

No right time to say goodbye

Minutes ago, I was outside the biz library, not wanting to go in cos my hands were wet and the library was chilly. So i wandered around for a bit, before settling my butt down on the steps close to the bus stop behind the library. I didn't know what to do, cos most of my free time, the spare minutes I have in between studying, in between toilet breaks and what-not would be spent, calling you, talking to you, checking up on you, before shooing you off the line cos I had to resume studying. This time, it was different, calling you wasn't an option no more. Messaging you wasn't either. But I'm okay. I settled with listening to the few random songs I had in my phone, which were all ironically, sent to me by you. I just sat there, and then started muffling the part of my phone that was emitting the noise cos it got a bit too loud. I guess thats how I'm gonna recover, and move on. Living with these relics of you in my life,cos its impossible to remove all of them anyway. Just this morning, out of a whimsical urge, I wanted to see if i could find 5 things that were scattered on my desk that reminded me of you, and I found seven, without even trying. So, removing you, is not going to be hard, its going to be impossible. So, I'll live, live with whatever I have left of you, the cherished moments, the sweet momentos and relics of the precious memories, and I will be okay. Just as you will be, in time. There's no right time to say goodbye, there never is, but for us, it was yesterday, and it will be okay. I wish you love and happiness. Have faith, take care.

Bitter things have a sweet after-taste

I dunno how true my title is, especially where food is concerned, but experience-wise I think its true. Life has a way of throwing you your share of misery in the weirdest shapes and forms, and well, it hurts of course. But then, you recover, you muster enough faith, you snap out of this bout of self-pity, and then something miraculously happens to change your fate for the better, if not to the best you can imagine.

My day today was something like that. Maybe I made it a bit too grandiose-sounding, but yeah well it was somehting like that. Felt sad for a bit cos I couldn't drive the car, I know this sounds extremely TRIVIAL but well its alot more complicated that that. See, I had promised to fetch my mum from work, cos she's working at ULU Changi, and I had to get permission from my Aunt to drive the car. My aunt lives really nearby by the way and her car's like the family car, shared by the drivers in my family; her and her son (my cousin) and now, yours truly has joined the list, after I got my licence. Well so I had my hopes up high, cos I was excited at the prospect of driving ALL the way to Changi in that new car (yeah its a new car) but my excitement had more to do with the joy of being able to fetch my mum from work. Being the lady who has toiled for everyday of my life (ok minus public holidays AND weekends, BUT STILL, SHEESH), she obviously deserves the very best. And I was sad cos I thought I couldn't get to use the car even after promising to fetch her, cos my aunt said my cousin may need it for his alumni band stuff. Anyway, to cut things short, I got to use the car cos apparently my cousin didn't need it after all, but not without my aunt and grandma hyperventilating in anxiety throughout the WHOLE trip. hahahaha. Such little faith in my driving, tsk tsk. In fact the moment I reached home, my grandma practically WOOSHED out a sigh of relief (the way dragons do). Hahahah. Hilarious! But still! Hey I passed for a reason right!

Anyhow, this is my SECOND entry for today, if you haven't already noticed. Its a wonder how I suddenly find so much time and need to blog when my exams are urm 2 days away, yeah on FRIDAY 9 AM SUMMORE! OH OH OH, here are the comments of my trusty driving "coach" on MSN, who was next to me when I drove just now.


and i will, only because I believe. says:
was my driving reali ok?

bonjour...le nom est kai says:
ur driving was superb

bonjour...le nom est kai says:
i'm very proud of u

bonjour...le nom est kai says:
keep up the good work my dear

I should show THAT to my grandma.

OMG! Hello WORLD! hahahaha. ITS BEEN CRAZY LONG right! since i last updated! hehe. I'm all smiles and laughter today, and i really think its the coffee, or more specifically the mocha I just drank! Haha, just crazy happy la. I think I love coffee you know, and kai has offered to get me lifetime supply of coffee for our next anni. ANYWAY, how's you? I miss you terribly! yeah YOU! All my friends! I can't wait for all the exams to end and to start rejoicing and have all that fun I've deprived myself of lately.

Oh proper updates include: my recent internship offer with Euromonitor International. WEE! When I was called for an interview, boy was I thrilled! Cos its a consulting and market research firm for real! I mean that's their core business y'all. How cool is that? I've always wanted to end up in the consulting industry, *dreams*, big names like BCG and Accenture and all excite me. MAN!
Anyway, I have to talk about the interview I had last Monday. I was there at 4pm, and could only leave at 630pm! Why? Cos I had 2 TESTS to sit for! When the guy I was suppose to meet for my interview told me about the test, I nearly CHOKED (behind his back of course), I mean 1hour long u know! And the first one tested my writing style, and explored the non-alcoholic drinks market in Singapore, and I had to infer and comment on the trends and market proportion of the different drinks sector, and attribute all these information to factors related to marketing trends. Honestly, I wasn't thinking clearly, but well, clear enough to churn out a 3 page essay la. So, thank GOD! Then I had a short 15 minutes numerical test which was surprisingly easy, I mean by my lousy maths standards I must add. So yeay! I got the internship! Quite excited cos this firm's office is way bigger than the last one I interned at, and I saw a good racial mix, of westerners and indians and all. And like I said, its a REAL time MARKETING firm! Woo hoo! Okay I shall stop. Just not too keen about the idea of having to wake up early for work for 3 months, especially since that will be the most intensive period for our Hyperjive planning. Guys who are reading this, please please support me ok? For Hyperjive! Its this mass Aerobics event scheduled on the 25th of August in NUS, Multi Purpose Sports Hall 1, from 2-5pm. There will be goodie bags and it will be fun!! I promise! =)

Okay enough promoting already. Anyway on another unrelated note, my 21st birthday's approaching. Apparently two people were already in the midst of planning a surprise party for me, when something cropped up, and I got to know about it. HAHA. Nvm la cos I think I have to forestall my birthday celebration plans for anyway, given how my last paper will be on the 8th of May, that's 3 days after my birthday! But well, its just a date anyway. Turning 21 shouldn't be such a big deal anyhow, its just important to grow as a person I suppose and to understand that life and your list of responsibilities will lengthen in years to come, and 21 just so happens to be the year that officially marks that transition. But yeah, other than that no biggie. Haha, but I really wanna throw a party, like some cool themed party, had crazy ideas with susu the other time, like a masquerade themed one, or even the old school kind where everyone has to come in their sec school uniform. HAHA, like real! I would not want some green pinafore as my 21st birhday outfit! (TKGS, no hard feelings. I still love you okay! =))
But well, we'll see how it goes. I wish all of you well and all the best for your exams! And my darling friends, please lets meet up soon after the exams! :D

so much has happened in such a short time. I'm so sorry.

impulse

Coffee makes me damn happy. Really. The rush of caffeine n sugar is all too good for me, it gives me this rush of joy n optimism. So much so that I feel like a floating balloon. Hahaha. I love coffee. Blog's getting too boring eh? I guess it is. Kai thinks so atleast. Haha, oh well. Not that I have nothing to talk about la, i mean look at the progress of this entry so far, proves that u DON'T HAVE TO HAVE something to talk about in order to blog. But in any case I've been busy. Haven't we all? But well all's good so far and I'm happy. (Yes remember what coffee does to me). Anyway I do have something to talk about. I often wonder why many of us are so driven to read what others have to say/blog about. Many a times these bloggers don't half know what they're talking about anyway. Perhaps its out of boredom, but I think its more than that. There's this strange attraction to wanting to read the thoughts of others somehow bcos ur seeking in their words, for a mirror/reflection to ur thoughts. Reading the thoughts of others I think is some kind of a reflection and understanding of ur own thoughts, many of which are left un-pondered otherwise. I guess reading blogs drives out some kind of reaction of u, and its that reaction that u seek. Its that mentation (yes there is such a word, it means 'thought') that u desire, but why though? Are we really that bored? Are we really incapable of deriving our own response without needing blogs to trigger them off? I bet we do. We all do. But still, this strong irresistible pull to read the blogs of others persists. I have decided to stop though. Reading the blogs of others I mean. I wonder how long I'll last.

As you age, you tend to whine more.

I swear I'm aging. Like really. The car's free for usage now and its a saturday night! And I'm licensed! What better reason to take the car out for a ride? And I've got ready company! My wonderful cousin sister, but I'm just somehow not up to it. I'm TIRED, to say the least. The kinda tired that keeps u at home and end up blogging about how really tired u are instead of riding around the city to ur heart's fancy in the comfort of a four-wheeled vehicle. One or two years ago, it would have been different. My body could withstand the lack of sleep, the stress, the long days at school and still be up to late night redezvous outings. Somehow I never quite ran out of excitement and energy. In fact I was often put off by my frens who decide to go home early everytime we go out. NOW, things are different. Now, I'm whining about how easily tired I get. Ah, but things must change at some point anyway.

Today, I had to tend to the Aerobics booth at the NUS Open house. Crowd was okay, but really I think the sports club booths are rather redundant, but yes, for formality's sake, of course the sports clubs have to have their booths during the NUS open house, so I shall not complain. Talked a bit with Kiran (who was also there, manning the health n fitness booth) and with whom I haven't caught up with for so long despite the fact that we are faculty mates! Blame it on all the different mix of modles we're doing this sem. And I think Kiran has changed quite a bit. She's no longer the vivacious, cheery gal I always talked to and gushed -over hot-guys with. She just seems a lot more troubled and its really sad to know that such a close fren of mine hasn't been having it easy lately. Sighh, so much can happen within such a short time. Anyway I was showing her the dance videos of my dance concert and yeah it got me thinking bout all that has happened from december(when we first started practicing) to february the 28th (the day of the concert), and so the rest of this entry will be a very belated description of all that has happened for 'Elysium 2008' dance concert.

3 words to describe the whole experience: highly-political & tiring. That's a rather pessimistic view of the whole experience I suppose, but these words are at the tip of my mind everytime I think about the whole experience. Mentally exhausting for me too, cos there was alot of pressure to perform and somehow it seemed as if I was one of the sloest dancers around. But I'm glad tings worked out well enough in the end. Atleast there were 12 of us who stuck through thick and thin, and that is by far the top reason why I'm so proud of myself. Cos even when things get bitchy, and tiring, I stayed on when many had no qualms leaving. Sometimes though I ask yself if being so self-sacrificing, compromising and patient is worth all that exhaustion and unhappiness. But well, let's leave it at that cos its over anyway. Like any other experience, pleasant or not, I take away with me precious lessons. 1) To trust yourself and have confidence in your abilities. 2) to respect even the "weaker" ones cos its usually the weaker ones who emerge strongest and who hold the unwavering faith in themselves . 3) I'm not that fantastic a dancer, atleast no way near the standards of professional dancers out there, though I'm inclined to think it could be because they train EVERYDAY and atleast 8 hours or so per day. All in all though, the concert allowed me to do something I love best, dancing and performing, and I guess that made it worth all that exhaustion and tension. :)

K here are some of the photos of the concert itself:

me n sul

me n vicky

Eka n I

rad, me n sul

me n vicky

me n amanda

ant, me n sul

Come reggae with me

Went shopping with hani yesterday. To pass her, her bday gift and to shop around for summore for all those ppl whom I owe gifts. This year will be the 21st bday of so many frens so the gifts all have to be somewhat special, no? That will really equate to a bigger hole in my pocket/purse. Hahah, but no of cos I'm not complaining! These darlings are worth it, anytime!

I've just finished my MA question for presentation, and I pray that there aren't any mistakes to that, hopefully! Okay I'm feeling damn blah. Losing that closest-to-toned-up body I ever had after all that crazy dance practices to Old Chang Kee and feel-happy food, that won't make me too happy after I'm done with them. Oh well, atleast I made an effort today! I went for half an hour of yogilatez and one hour of latinorobics and picked up this new latin dance called "Zumba". Haha, its cute and fun, as all latin dances are, but I still dig reggae the most. If I were to ever take up any dance classes, it'd be reggae for sure! Anyhow I'm considering on teaching anyone aerobics or latino (Rhumba/salsa) steps. Just an urge. Maybe I'll organise a class next sem with you you. Will see. Okay I need to peel the contact lenses off my dried out eyeballs now. BYeeeee!